Friday, April 21, 2006

I AM WHO I PAINT I AM
Spring also means the beginning of the eye rolling for the maraud of what I will call “false advertising” within my gender group. I mean the body tanning, the obsession of putting tiny glitter pieces in your skin and piles of dead cow fat over your lips to give that naughty-afternoon TV drama sorry girl look. I have decided to look at a few summer/spring looks to give my opinion to fuel my argument to stay home from the bars on Thursdays.
Self Tanner- What is so appealing about smearing orange pigment all over your skin so you look nothing like your original skin-tone? I guess since they started telling young girls everywhere that skin cancer causes premature ageing they all got the smart idea that rubbing chemicals into the pores of your skin is a little safer. Uh what? So this magical cream is supposed to make me look as if I have been wasting my days on a summer beach? I wonder what the reports in five years are going to say when they come out when little girls everywhere start getting skin problems and rashes after sealing their skin up with animal fat, toxins and shoe polish (yeah- that’s right- you know what it is). Also what is so attractive like wanting to look like a worn out leather boot anyway? I don’t get this stuff at all and I would rather spend a few hours on my deck in the sun with a good book throwing small rocks at the nearby Wasp Nest in my roommates disgruntled car then be forced to waddle around naked with my arms and legs out as I fear getting an itch or sitting down with that body-staining chemical concoction.

Lip Gloss- This item always makes me think of one of my favourite Pulp songs. “Oh you lost your lip gloss honey- Oh yeah- Now nothing you do will turn him on- there is something wrong, you had it once but something gone-“ and so on. I know the benefits of having un-chapped lips, but greasy reflective lips are just nuts. Do these girls know they look like porn stars from the 1980’s when they apply the 10 billion layer of cow fat on their lips? The other point I want to make is now that “glossing” is now socially accepted and you can reapply anywhere now, even trucking it down the sidewalk to your baby’s daddy’s house. Its also frustrating when you are trying to talk to someone and mid conversation they whip out the stick (because apparently lip gloss is THAT addictive) and apply apply apply when they talk to you. Lip Gloss is the new crack for young women.

Flip Flops- The worst shoe fashion ever thought up since ugs. At least you know no one can sneak up behind you in flip flops, but when did girls get the idea that “floppies” were acceptable for work environments? Flip flops are for the beach and to be worn is public shared washrooms to prevent foot fungus- so think of them as foot underwear next to socks. Try running in flops, nope! The worst is that most of the young girls who wear flops never pick up their feet and shuffle through the malls making lousy scraping noises while they apply the 8th layer of gloss on their lips before crashing into the back of some other person carrying 2 shopping bags.

MAD CAP DANCE SKILLS


Thank you, Silvercreek PS! You kids know how to dance and really cheered me up that day. I can’t wait to line the back of my office door with all of your letters and make sure to keep your eyes peeled for a special AnnK treat coming your way soon!

@ Friday, April 21, 2006

ALL ABOUT ANNK!

I am a painter, I eat, sleep, talk. I slack, I do housework. I write stories, I watch TV, use the computer.
I hail from Milton, my friends are from Milton. We live, we drink coffee, we sleep in little beds.

We are just like you only maybe not as close.

Y

MY LOVELIST

I love...
apple juice, cookies, warm summer mornings, books, cotton fibers, pastel coffee mugs, holidays, flowers, French,  rainy days, fresh laundry smell.

I also love playing Earthbound!

N

MY  HATELIST

People who smell like pea soup.


HOW TO GET AN ANNK

- I like flowers. Girls like flowers.

- I like comic books- ones with crazy stories in them. That is a sure win.

- I need spray paint... to umm... decorate. Girls are totally into that decorating crap.

- I have my eyes on Leonard Cohen's new book of poems.

- I like video games so make sure you buy lots of tokens for the arcade at the theater.

Recently bought CD:
The Breeders Last Splash- Third time buying this album and this time is for keeps!


Please leave me a message and I will bet back to you ASAP!


PLEASE VISIT MY FRIENDS PLACES!

{♥} Greg
{♥} Sarah
{♥} Gail
{♥} Colin

designer : kathleen
image : jde

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Too True, too rude